I was born and raised in Prince George’s County Maryland, Fort Washington to be exact. After graduating from Bishop McNamara High School, I attended East Carolina University to pursue a bachelor’s degree in Biology. My career goal was to become a physician. After three semesters of college science classes, I changed my major to Psychology, in hopes of eventually becoming a psychologist. I ended up transferring to Morgan State University in the fall of 2009, where I continued my education as a psychology major. There, I also became a member of the First and Finest sorority created by and for black women, Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated. Upon graduating, I quickly learned that a bachelor’s degree in psychology was not enough for a “good job”. I was no longer interested in being a psychologist. I was actually quite unsure of what I wanted to do. I eventually decided to pursue a career in Human Resources but I knew that my bachelor’s degree would not suffice, so I enrolled in a graduate program at Trinity Washington University and graduated with a master’s degree in Organizational Development. I was able to land jobs within the Human Resources field but I never felt fulfilled or that I belonged. I always felt that God was calling me to do more than work a 9 to 5, but I didn’t know what it was.
Back in 2012, God gave me a vision that I would be put in a position to empower a mass of women. I honestly thought it was starting a a young adult women’s ministry at my home church but that never took off. I was confused, but I never forgot about that vision. Since then, I had served as a mentor to young girls and a speaker at small ceremonies and women’s conferences, but in the fall of 2019, He clarified that vision and put me in a position to start my own coaching firm. What led to being placed in this position was very painful and I often questioned why it had to happen to me. But I now see how God used it for His glory. Not only have I overcome that situation, I was able to turn my pain into passion, purpose and prosperity by what I like to call the three E’s: Embrace. Evolve. Experience.
Embrace your transition. Begin your healing process by learning to accept your current position. Keep in mind that where you are is not your final destination.
Evolve your truth. What do you see when you view your reflection? What words do you use to describe yourself? Are they positive? If not, change your vocabulary.
Experience your transformation. Once you overcome that thing, some people won’t know what to do with the new you. Make no apologies and don’t look back.
Embracing my transition was the most difficult part. To give you a bit of background, I was engaged after being a long-term relationship and my wedding was called off just one month before I was supposed to get married. So when I say I know pain, trust me, I know pain. It was a very traumatic situation and I didn’t know how I was going to get through it. In addition to being a certified life coach, I’m also a mother. One night while the situation was still fresh, my son who was a little over a year old at the time, gave me our first hug and at that moment, I knew that I couldn’t stay stuck in that state of sadness. I knew that I was going to have to push through my pain. I still had to tend to my son, I still had to go to work, I still had to live. I had to accept what had taken place and move on with my life. I was unclear about what was going to happen next, so all I could do was trust God and take things one day at a time.
Evolving my truth was much easier than embracing my transition, but it was still a challenge. Evolving my truth meant changing the way I saw myself. It meant changing the way I spoke to and about myself. Ultimately, it meant forgiving myself and giving myself grace. Self-forgiveness is probably the most difficult part of the healing process after acceptance because there are constant reminders of what went wrong. I would blame myself and rack my brain trying to think of what I did wrong and what I could have done to avoid the break up. But over time, something happened. I stopped blaming myself and I stopped trying to get an explanation. I no longer felt like the culprit or the victim. Eventually, I started to see the blessing and I realized that I was the blessing. I realized that there was greater for me. I realized that one man was not my last chance at love and happiness. Once I started realizing and truly believing these things, my entire outlook on life changed.
Experiencing my transformation was the fun part. The scary part about it was that it was almost involuntary. I started speaking differently and I feel like I even started to look different. I started purging things that no longer served a purpose, including clothing and accessories. My taste in clothing and accessories had changed so it gave me an excuse to do some shopping! I was becoming more organized, I developed an interest in learning new recipes, and I started drinking water more than any other beverage. I also developed an even greater interest in my feminine hygiene and maintenance. I started dropping old habits and forming new ones. I was becoming an even better mother. The best part was I started to hear from the Holy Spirit more clearly. He was giving me revelation and confirmation like never before. He started preparing me to become the woman I always admired and wanted to be.